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In South Africa, I am weakened, afraid, vulnerable — and mostly afraid. We live in a country where femicide has thrived as a “just punishment” for women simply existing. From a young age, we have been taught to shrink ourselves, while our male counterparts have been groomed to see themselves as superior. What this has created is a world where women are unsafe, often from those closest to them.
This violence is not new. It is a deep wound that has festered for centuries. Yet the blatant, vile attitude of “she must die” has become louder, more visible, and more frightening. It is destroying womanhood.
Physical harm, humiliation, and death have become disturbingly normalised. Conversations about killing women for perceived betrayal are spoken of casually. I once overheard three young men say they would kill their girlfriends if they cheated — their tone was light, as if discussing football, not murder.
Women in South Africa have been killed for “crimes” such as ending a relationship, refusing advances, or simply choosing themselves. How dare you walk away? How dare you say no? You must die.
These deaths are rooted in a terrifying belief that women are not human — that we are possessions, pets, or slaves. Our children, too, are sometimes seen as tools or extensions of control. Even in public, a woman’s right to exist is questioned. For daring to walk tall, speak loudly, or reject unwanted attention, she can be slapped, insulted, or worse — branded with names like sifebe or jezebel for the “crime” of existing freely.
To stand your ground in this country is an act of courage. But to remain silent is worse than death — because silence feeds the monster.
The statistics lay bare the truth. South Africa’s femicide rate is five times the global average, according to the UN Office on Drugs and Crime. Police data shows that 1,101 women were murdered between July and September 2024 alone, meaning roughly 12 women are killed every day. In the same period, 15,000 sexual offences were reported — many against children. Most of these crimes were committed by men known to their victims.
We are dying not at the hands of strangers, but at the hands of those who claim to love us.
Unless we, as a society, decide that women’s lives matter, our collective humanity will continue to die with them.
